My Pig Jokes Page 2

What do you get when you cross a pig with a canary?
     I don't know, but when it sits on your electric wire and sings, all your lights go out

Why do pigs run into trees?
     To shake out the alligators.
I've never seen an alligator In a tree.
     That's because the pigs do such a good job.

Is lunch the favorite subject of piglets?
     No, it's theatre. They love to ham It up and hog all the attention.

Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team?
     Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.

Why wouldn't the bird let her chicks go near the pig pen?
     She didn't want the pigs eating shredded tweet.

The kids are crazy about a new piglet toy.
     When they wind it up, it eats all the spinach off their plates.

Why is a pig in a water trough like a penny?
     Because its head is on one side and its tail is on the other.

All our pigs are learning karate.
     Oh, I don't believe that No?
Well, just watch out for their chops.

Why did the pig run away from the pig sty?
He felt that the other pigs were taking him for grunted.

Why did the little piglet fall in love with the hog?
     Because he was such a sloppy dresser.

What did the mama pig say to her bad little piglet?
     "Behave or Frankenswine will get you."

Why do pigs never recover from illness ?
     Because you have to kill them before you cure them !

The hog was a failure as a TV talk show host
     What happened?
He turned out to be a big boar.

Why is the cook worried about catching his runaway pig?
     He knows a little ham goes a long way.

Is it true the pigs went over Niagara Falls in a barrel?
     No, that story's just a lot of hogwash.

Why didn't the pigs eat the rotten eggs in their feed trough?
     They were saving the best for last.

Did you hear about the pigs who took up motorcycling?
      They wanted to catch bugs with their teeth.

Why was the pig unhappy in the Minors?
     Because he wants to play in the Pig Leagues.

Why did the pig send his story to New York?
     He wanted to be published on Pork Avenue.

Why is your dad chasing those pigs through the garden?
     We're raising mashed potatoes.

What soft drink do pigs like best?
     Root beer.

Where do bad pigs go?
     They get sent to the pen.

How does a pig write home?
      With a pig pen.